"D-Dad..."
"Where have you been?... Did you manage to scrounge any money today?..."
"... No."
He punches me in the face and I tumble down on the floor.
"You... You're somehow more pathetic than your sister. At your age she was bringing decent money here. Seriously what an actual fucking disgrace, you."
Retorting is useless. No matter what, he will not listen, he will not change. It's useless to remind him that HE has a job as well, as he's too lazy to do even that now.
"Get up." He kicks my stomach and I do what I'm told, trying to hold back the tears from all the hurt that I'm feeling.
"Why are you crying huh?" He grabs the chock-full of my hair and forces me to look at me.
"I-I'm not crying..."
"Bullshit! WHY ARE YOU CRYING HUH?!"
He beats and yells at me, while I'm praying for this to be over. He continues to insult me, saying how much of a crybaby I am and that I'm not manly enough, not good enough. He finishes by throwing me on the floor and spitting at me, before he retreats into his room. Being glad that it's all over now, I retreat to my room as well and plop on the bed.
All these girls... They have loving parents. They're always concerned about their well being and won't let anyone hurt them. Seeing Sol being happy with her dad and Cathy loving her aunt... Just why am I the exception here? Why do I have to suffer?
Sylvie... Mother... Why are you not here?... I'm scared...
I cry into my pillow, because I too wanted to be loved as well.
When did it all go downhill? Why must I suffer when others not? Why didn't I have an ordinary life like they have? U-Uwaaaah...
But...
"Geez, stop crying. It's annoying and it makes me feel bad."
"Do not weep, my goldilock. It'll be all over soon."
"Br... Braaa~!"
I have to be strong. I have to be better than that.
"Stealing is wrong, brother, remember that! Only bad and miserable guys do that, like our dad! They too struggle to stay afloat."
"Do not envy one's fortune. It's the gravest sin one can make that taints one soul."
"Looooove~!"
It's no use looking at them and feeling sorry for myself. Because one day, I'll be free.
I'll be free from this madness.
And let myself be a kid again.
And I will not let that bastard control our life.
"Hmm... First sister, then your mother and my new toy that I didn't get to touch... I guess I will be coming for you next when I'm bored~"
Ah yeah, I must record my day in the diary.
"<...> And so in spite of my dad ruining it, it was still a fun day. Can't wait to finish my training and become Miss Carolyn assistant. Hopefully Sylvie forgives me and her beyond her grave."
Locking my door securely, I change into my pajamas and go to bed. Hugging my sister's pillow tightly, I drift off to slumber.
At least I have something to look forward to waking up to. And I'm truly glad for that.